I’ve found myself on the very last soul centre of my new healing manual for my new course (Energy for Abundance). To get here I’ve channeled mammoth amounts of light data to research and articulate the energetic work I’ve been playing with in clinic, the magic and the mystery of the soul centres.
The soul centres are energetic portals that channel your spiritual energy into the earth plane and hold the blueprint of your soul’s work, vision and intention.
And I can’t wait to share them with you and teach you how to leverage and channel them to activate your abundance.
I’ve finished every soul centre, embodied and been in rapture with them all, watched them sparkle, shift and activate as I’ve expanded my awareness through them. Except this last one. She’s been sitting here quietly, serenely, watching me dance around the edges, as I pretend I’m doing the work through the other centres. Waiting until I take a deep breath and draw my attention to her.
So can you guess which one I’ve left til last?
My expression centre.
The part of me that encapsulates my voice, the wild expression of my gifts, my right to be and my innate yearning to be seen and heard. The essence of my radiance and my choice to draw my desired experiences to me.
My expression has always been an intimate part of my healing. I had a pattern of staying quiet through injustice. Of holding back on expressing my needs to keep everyone else happy. Of having so much to say but not knowing how to speak up about the deep, raw, different parts of me.
She’s the part of me I’ve shut down. Pretending I wasn’t all that spiritual. Laughed at the family in-jokes about me being so ‘out-there’. Ran everyone else’s race of success and over-achieved my little heart out.
The wounds on her grew and I struggled against the blocks wedged tightly here for so long. When I used to lose my words. When I trembled at getting up on stage. My terror of interviews and public speaking. The psychic remnants of struggling for my right to be heard and the ancient memory of being strangled.
I’ve been through such an epic healing journey with my voice and she shines brighter now than ever before. I’ve had moments of white light, glorious soul realisations, hurricanes of emotional release, chakric cleansing, toning and harmony, power punches, blessings of the highest order and above all, practice, practice, practice.
I’ve learnt to sing my story, yell it from the rooftops, moan, cry, laugh and shake things up with my voice.
I’ve learnt that I am free to allow my soul’s desires to work through me.
So, it was fascinating for me as I landed here on the empty page of the Expression Centre, feeling blocked in what to say. I could feel the old rumblings of anxiety. I’ve been tired all day. Hungry enough to eat the whole fridge. Overwhelmed. Willing to give up. And most of all, sad.
Sad that I’m still meeting the blocks in my expression.
Ah, where has my voice gone?
Deeper it seems, into the caverns of memory and transmutation. Into the duality of myself, my light and my dark.
Which is not that strange, considering I’m choosing to learn the mysteries of the ocean of my soul and learn how my light force channels itself into the world.
When we are responsible for channeling new vibrational energies for the earth, we are called to heal so that we are strong enough and vibrating at the highest possible frequency to allow the information in.
On my opposing nature and the story of my witch
One part of me is this confident, free flowing, magnetic goddess and she loves dancing for all of you. She loves being seen and heard and expressing her beauty.
There’s another part of me that is freaking terrified of the spotlight. She quivers and trys to run for the woods. She’s the part of the memory of my witch who is terrified of their pitch forks and their bitter tongues and she wants for nothing more than to be in her safe haven, her hut, away from risk and not really having to be out there in the world.
The witch of those times made a great sacrifice for her sisters. She was led by her magic, her connection to the world that others could not see and she walked a lonely path. She experienced the pain of persecution and being burned alive.
Her role was not for her freedom, it was for ours.
And we can feel her. We know her as ourselves, even if you have no recollection that your soul has ever incarnated as a witch. As a Woman, you know her. You see her in the world today, the denouncement of her sacred. Where she’s supposed to squash and contain herself in a world of goals and strategy and facebook likes. Trying to make herself digestable. Living by this idea that she’s too much and not enough all at the same time.
Have you ever had that? I’m too much for people, too out-there, too spiritual, too woo-woo, too raw, too emotional, too crazy, too radical. The story of my life! And at the same time, I’m not enough. Not worthy, not valueable, not liked, not desired, not polished, not perfect enough.
Society made it’s judgement of the witch because it was too sacred. She wasn’t too much, she was exactly the illumination the world needed to show how far it had gone in it’s pursuit of safety.
So if you see the witch within yourself, hand back this judgment placed on you, you are not required to lower your vibration or your consciousness for the world and it’s survival needs. And let’s be tender, with eachother, for all the times we have judged ourselves as too much or not enough and tried to contain it.
The archetype of the witch seems to flow really powerful through the power centre and the expression centre. You may see these two centres as the solar plexus and the throat chakra, if you’re familiar with my model, we know them as the power soul centre and the expression soul centre. The witch represents our call to own our power and to speak our truth. If we’re fragmented within our power, we won’t feel steady enough to speak our truth. If you’re like me, you may have all sorts of real life experiences from the pitch fork in my hip (an old hip condition that used to feel like I was pierced at the hip) to the times in this lifetime where I kept quiet when I should have spoken up. These wounds can be lodged right into the epicenter of our souls, disconnecting us from the divine love and infinite power to be who we are.
We are healing.
In fact, it is the time of the witch. She is rising. You can feel her in the beautiful new wisdom that’s flowing forth from these vibrant womanly communities. You can see her in awesome reclaiming the witch and the priestess programs. In the divine feminine revolution. The fact that there are so many women awakening to their destiny to be a leader and to sell their gifts and restore the balance of riches to the Woman.
So Woman, if you can feel the tremors in your expression, feel the call of your soul to get out there with your voice and your message, take heart. You are the vessel for not only your individual healing but the healing of the collective.
The healing of our voices and our inner witch. The healing of our expression centres so that the light of our soul can rush through.
May tsunamis of absolute love and blinding light rush through your expression centre and clear out every wound, every block, every fear lodged against your divinity.
May you be free to sing your truth from the treetops.
We want to hear you.